Bloody Coffee

So I know 10:30 is not late, but it's about 2 hours later than I have been going to sleep lately and I am still wide awake :(
Combination of things really - 1. Had a coffee today. Have been avoiding coffee recently because it seems to be having a disturbing effect on my heart (big thumping of the heart - more than is considered normal I think). But I was so tired this morning and was going to look at rentals with Mum. Now have heartburn - a new thing to me and incredibly unpleasant; as well as being wide awake and having a slightly too vigorous heartbeat.
2. Looked at rentals with Mum today, found one we love, don't seem to have any competition - yet, however need to move fast. My father does not seem to entirely grasp this concept and it makes me very nervous, Mum and I aren't prepared to lose this one. So I am thinking about that - and also of course planning the layout of the rooms if we do get it :)
3. I am having lunch with B tomorrow. I haven't yet seen him since I got back, so for around 3 years I think. So whilst I don't want to get too excited... it seems I am.
We are still speaking every day, he is so lovely. I know it's going to annoy me so much when Mum, and Dad more quietly judge him on his tattoos and piercings.
B seems to be prepared though, he asked me today if he should cover his piercings when he comes over. He seems to grasp that this is not going to be an easy relationship to explain to my parents, in terms of the timing (pregnancy) and that we are going to need to be careful with my parents and try ease them into it and make them understand we aren't taking this lightly and that we are aware the baby is the priority and all the complications that come with that.
And the parents have to be able to accept it because hopefully B isn't going anywhere, and I will be living with Mum and Dad for a minimum of 3 years now that I am the reason they will be doubling their rent ( I am paying half once we move of course, but if I move out they would be a bit screwed)
I think I am at the nesting stage and that is quite difficult when I don't have a house to nest in. I really want to get JJ's room set up so I can figure out what I have and what I need and prepare.
It's raining pretty heavily at the moment. I quite like it. The weather has been really surprisingly nice all week, cool mornings but warm days and lots of sun. But this weekend the bad weather hit, but yeah, I like it.
Hmmm JJ is kicking. He is getting much stronger or bigger or both. I seem to have had another belly growth spurt this week, I didn't realise until I looked in the mirror last night but Mum said she had already noticed it.
Hmm nothing like Marylin Manson when you are trying to get to sleep. Then again, it is the cover of Sweet Dreams so I guess that is appropriate.
I do have some taped TV shows I could be watching but it will be so cold out of bed :(
The book I am reading is crap, its about this sexist raver druggie guy and it just reminds me of J - the raver druggie part at least.
God I am going to be exhausted tomorrow.
Can't remember if I blogged earlier this week, don't think so. Met my new doctor, who will also be the one delivering JJ, who is lovely, really happy with her. Turned out though my blood pressure and iron were both too low. Blood pressure being low seems to come with pregnancy and it is a bit better now, and I have gotten back onto the iron supplement - ugh.
Ugh so wish I could sleep.
Anyway I think you are more or less up to date so I will go check my facebook and then consider what to do with the remainder or my night.
Goodnight.

Updates Continued

So it's late and I'm tired but I thought I should also update about what's going on with B. No he hasn't just drifted into oblivion like every other guy in this blog.
We have talked almost every day for the last few weeks, I think he is finally doing better.
Don't get me wrong, I am still well aware that he is just out of a relationship and I am pregnant, as I advised him tonight when he asked me if he could cook me dinner when I get back.
I told him the idea sounded romantic and that was confusing given the situation, he agreed but offered again.
So yes, I will have dinner with him, but being very cautious that he is aware I am well on my way to having a big belly, and at a certain point not wanting to have sex, and then not having time to have sex, let alone anything else, and that my body will not be all better once the baby is out, if anything it will look worse. I just think he needs to really appreciate those facts before thinking he wants a relationship with me at this point.
There is a big pause here while I am thinking of what else to say.
Because of course I would love to have B by my side, and not in any way am I looking for a daddy for my baby. Wanting B is about me and how amazing he is, although it doesn't help that I know he would love my baby too. But I just don't think he needs to sign up for that, because I am not just me now, I am this morphing version of me and soon I will have a little me with me 24/7. Of course I secretly hope that he does want to sign up for that but I have to be so careful.

Updates Updates

Quick update I've been meaning to write for ages, quick because my crappy ass laptop battery will die any minute.

So started to really feel baby kick around 2 weeks ago - at the cat who was lying on my stomach at the time, cute. The purring still seems to set him off.

Had 20 week ultrasound this week - was really cool but beyond painful - especially the next day. There was alot of excess poking and prodding because baby refused to move - Oh and its a boy! Yeah so i had to go for a couple of runs (with my neice) around hallways and up and down stairs trying to get it to move. It was quite cozy though, one leg really stretched out - very posey. Have to go back tomorrow though to try again to get a good shot at its heart.

And I got gastro this week :( didn't last long and I got off lightly but my 3 year old neice got it last night :( poor little munchkin.

Hmm what else before the battery dies.

Moving in just over a week. My back really freaking hurts where all the pregnancy stuff is going on. my belly has a definete and contoured baby bump. The cat loves cuddling it.

I think thats a good catch up. if i think of anything else it can wait until I recharge.