Just had the realisation that maybe spending all day in bed is not purely due to feeling sick and sore, and tired, but maybe a bit because I am sad too.
I sort of feel like I am fading into oblivion. Though about messaging C, messaged him the other day and told him I missed him, had a bit of a chat, all rather pointless though isn't it.
But I mean I have gone from spending $400 a month on my phone to $50, I barely speak to people, i don't go anywhere, I don't really have any friends here, especially in the town where my parents live, I am paranoid every time I go out that I will run into someone from my past.
This baby is a good thing, it will be great. But I feel like I've sacraficed my independence and lost all my friends.
I don't know.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Saturday, March 20, 2010
My sea monkey looks like a real monkey!
So I haven't filled you in for a little while now, considering I haven't been doing anything much there has been alot going on.
So I moved back over here, have been staying with my sister E and her family, which has been good, relaxing and stuff.
I'm down at Mum and Dads at the moment, for a week or two, yet to be decided.
Have been speaking to Mum and she thinks I should have the baby down here and look for a bigger house with her and Dad, I think it's a good idea. With my rough budget I can't afford any rentals near my sisters place, but sharing with Mum and Dad would help us both out.
But my sister E will think it's a stupid idea because she is still mad at Mum, and maybe always will be, I'm so worried by that now I'm in between it. I hope she sorts it out before the baby comes, but considering she has been holding a grudge for like 10 years I won't hold my breath.
And my sister C will think I am being selfish by burdening Mum and Dad. But I have spoken to Mum about it and if we get a big enough house we will have our own space, and I will be able to help out with rent and bills and housesitting.
We shall see.
Hmmmmm and there is K, I finally explained to him that I am being so weird because I think this is really bad timing to start something, however promising it looks. He understands and is being really good about it, we are going to see how things go. We will go out when he is in town next week.
Anyway my typing is annoying Mum, lol. Talk soon.
So I moved back over here, have been staying with my sister E and her family, which has been good, relaxing and stuff.
I'm down at Mum and Dads at the moment, for a week or two, yet to be decided.
Have been speaking to Mum and she thinks I should have the baby down here and look for a bigger house with her and Dad, I think it's a good idea. With my rough budget I can't afford any rentals near my sisters place, but sharing with Mum and Dad would help us both out.
But my sister E will think it's a stupid idea because she is still mad at Mum, and maybe always will be, I'm so worried by that now I'm in between it. I hope she sorts it out before the baby comes, but considering she has been holding a grudge for like 10 years I won't hold my breath.
And my sister C will think I am being selfish by burdening Mum and Dad. But I have spoken to Mum about it and if we get a big enough house we will have our own space, and I will be able to help out with rent and bills and housesitting.
We shall see.
Hmmmmm and there is K, I finally explained to him that I am being so weird because I think this is really bad timing to start something, however promising it looks. He understands and is being really good about it, we are going to see how things go. We will go out when he is in town next week.
Anyway my typing is annoying Mum, lol. Talk soon.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
1 more sleep
Well right now I am outside, and it is cold. I am getting my carpets cleaned, last night in Victoria tonight.
Slept on the floor last night, was so painful I didn't sleep much at all and gave up completely at 4:30, got up and finished packing then went to McDonalds for breakfast instead.
Went out for dinner with my godmother and her family last night, it was so much fun.
Going to stay with my aunt tonight, not another night on that floor!
Wow I'm glad I am out here, that carpet cleaning stuff is smelly! Hope he finishes soon though, I am pretty tempted to crash out on the kitchen floor when he is done. Should really go to the Vic Markets or something, or go get Camerons Krispy Kreme, but I am just so tired!
Still feeling both sick and hungry most of the time. My tummy has started to stick out just a little bit more than usual.
These stairs are really uncomfortable :(
Anyway I don't really have alot to say so I might go back to playing solitare for a while.
Slept on the floor last night, was so painful I didn't sleep much at all and gave up completely at 4:30, got up and finished packing then went to McDonalds for breakfast instead.
Went out for dinner with my godmother and her family last night, it was so much fun.
Going to stay with my aunt tonight, not another night on that floor!
Wow I'm glad I am out here, that carpet cleaning stuff is smelly! Hope he finishes soon though, I am pretty tempted to crash out on the kitchen floor when he is done. Should really go to the Vic Markets or something, or go get Camerons Krispy Kreme, but I am just so tired!
Still feeling both sick and hungry most of the time. My tummy has started to stick out just a little bit more than usual.
These stairs are really uncomfortable :(
Anyway I don't really have alot to say so I might go back to playing solitare for a while.
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